Oh my God -Part Two
Peter glanced over at his partner, Paul and got no encouragement. This was definitely not going to be a good day. “ P. R. is an abbreviation for Public Relations and Millenials are people born around the turn of the century,” Peter replied obediently, hoping to appease the Lord with a direct answer. Well THAT was a bust too.
“And,” continued the Lord. “what’s an LGBTQ an’ how’dya pronounce that?” It was gettin’ very warm in the boardroom. Peter didn’t know what to say or who to pin the dilemma on.
“Well you see,” he sputtered, “it’s an acronym for all the groups o’ people who feel they have no voice, but they want to be heard an’ they ain’t havin’ any luck. There’s just too many o’ the rulin’ class yelling out their own agendas. It’s just a total mess. So we hired a promoter to develop a means that this could happen. What he’s doin’ is takin’ the first letter of each group and amalgamatin’ them into an anagram that every one will recognize, thus givin’ them a voice that everybody will recognize. That way people will know who’s talkin’ an’ perhaps pay some attention.”
Peter was just startin’ to feel a little vindicated when God asked, “Who is this promoter an’ where did he come from?”
“Well, he’s sort of on loan from – from – you know. His name is Schwartz an’ he’s really good at this stuff.”
“Schwartz? Schwartz? You mean the Schwartz that promoted buildin’ the Tower of Babel?” Thundered God as he slammed his fist down on the long oak table, smashin’ it into a million tiny splinters. “Jesus!” he roared.
Jesus of course was sittin’ in the boardroom. “Good one dad,” he chuckled. “I done that a couple’a thousand years ago at the walls o’ the temple. It sure got their attention at that time too. But slowly the greed for money took over again an’ we’re right back to square one.”
“I Damn it!” God muttered under his breath. He would have said ‘God Damn it’ but since he was God, this was more appropriate. “Them people are always tryin’ to take over the world -my world. Well, they’re gonna get a big surprise when they find out what they’re up against. Especially Schwartz. I can see now he’s nothin’ more than an agent of Lucifer. He can lead them astray all he wants, but me, he can’t confuse.
“Even when I drowned all them critters durin’ the great flood, I was good enough to preserve two of each to start all over again. Then when I froze the earth, I left just enough room for some who could withstand it to be able to survive. An’ still they persist in tryin’ to unlock the secrets of my world. Biggest mistake I ever made was to give them dominion over all creation. They got the idea that they could also have dominion over me as well. Hah! That’ll be the frosty Friday!