I think everybody should take the time to read Re Green's "The Beginners Book to Women". Well it ain't foolproof but it sure does have a lot o' useful information in it. To me it's pretty well the reference book I use whenever a "situation" arises. One o' the things I got outta it was that it's pretty good politics to try bein' helpful to yer spouse = or at least suggest that yer willin' to help at just about anythin'. It's the butterin' up process that improves with the thickness of the layer o' butter you apply.
Well, I done that last Tuesday - or Wednesday, I don't remember which. I was quite proud o' myself, in spite o' the fact that it didn't really work. The gesture itself was just fine, but it turns out the help was neither needed nor wanted.
We'd been out runnin' errands, shoppin' an' all sorts o' sundry stuff the day before until we were about done in. It all started out well enough. First we went to the dry cleaners. The Missus says, "Wait in the car, I'll be right out."
I reply, "My name is Victor and I'll be your waiter today."
"Ha ha," she says (with a wry little smile on her face). It was shapin' up to be a good day. Well it went on like that 'til about 2:00 p.m. when we finally got home. It was another hour before the Missus finished puttin' everthin' away (includin' ourselves for an afternoon nap).
The day was hummin' along just fine by the time dinner was done. The Missus was out on the patio readin' her book an' I was bein' helpful by doin' the dinner dishes. Well I finish up an' retire to the patio, all smug an' self satisfied when she says, "I'm all pooped out. We done too much today. Tomorrow I'm gonna do absolutely nothin'!"
"You want some help with that?" I ask enthusiastically in the spirit o' bein' helpful.
"Naw, I can manage," she replies, rollin' her eyes.
Well I get nervous when she's rollin her eyes, so I say: "No really, I got lots o' experience. I can help."
"Don't talk," she says, "I'm readin".
That pretty well ended my efforts to be helpful. At least that's how it seemed to me from up here on the top shelf.