Fundamental Differences
“Junk box!”
“Junk Box? Junk
box? JUNK BOX? JUNK BOX?”
“Yeah, it’s
nothing but a junk box.”
“That, my dear,
uneducated wife, is a tool chest – a very valuable tool chest.”
The withering look
I got was enough to melt the snow off Mount Everest. Where in the world did
that come from? I had to move the chest to another place, which I suppose,
brought it to her attention and she honed in on it like one o’ them heat
seeking missiles.
Holy crap! There’s
tools in there that are a hundert years old. And if that don’t count for
somethin’. So what if I don’t use them every day (or even ever use them).
They’re there in MY tool chest, right where they belong, and not in some junk
box! Didn’t I use some of them tools to make her jewelry case, or the picture
frames I made? I think it’s time I got a little respect around here.
But that ain’t
even the real issue. It ain’t even about respect for men’s things. It goes
right to the heart of what makes the world go ‘round. Well, just look at our
own country for example. There’s women premiers all over the place, and what do
you get? First thing you notice is the scrappin’ between Alberta and B.C. about
oil revenues. Then you get the lady from Quebec who’s stuck her foot in it
about language issues and post-secondary school fees. Nothin’ but trouble is
what these women are boilin’ up. And now some committee in the U.N. comes out
with a report that says Canada is number eleven in the hierarchy of developed
countries. How in the H-E-double hockey sticks did that ever happen? We used to
be number one for cryin’ out loud! Well, we men know for sure what happened.
Nature and nurture – my foot! Squabble an’ trouble is more like it. Holy
Hannah! How is the world goin’ to turn under matriarchal leadership? We’re goin’
to hell in a hand basket an’ the only thing them women got in their “tool
chest” is needles an’ thread an’ crochet hooks. And the on the other side is
lipstick an’ nail polish an’ essence of somethin’ or other. Talk about yer
“junk box”. How’re you gonna fix anythin’ with that?
The women ought’a
know by now that they got the power anyway. They even got this smug idea they
are superior to men. Well lah dee dah, we know all that already. They been
advertising it long enough. What’s to be gained by insults and put-downs?
There’s a line in the sand there somewhere, and they wanna toe the mark if they
know what’s good for them. Never you mind about the twinkle in the missus’ eye
when she was giving me the gears. She’s getting’ awful close to the line and it’s
a sensitive subject. At least that’s how it seems to me from up here on the top
shelf.
Just sayin’.
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